Second-Born Problems

I feel like an afterthought.

I have one sibling and she is barely two years older than me. Unfortunately, we've never been very close. I can't really pinpoint why exactly, but yeah.

Anyway, she had her son in February. He was the first grandchild of the family on my side anyway.

All throughout her pregnancy, we got to hear updates on the size of her baby, what it was doing, how she was feeling, and so on.

Everyone was keen to know.

Now that I'm pregnant, I feel like I get crickets. Even worse, when I do express any discomfort or pregnancy-related issues, it's like I get shut down immediately with statements like "this too shall pass."

It's hurtful. I want to be able to experience my pregnancy the same way. I want people to care (or at least pretend to care) about what is going on with me.

The problem with being the second-born is that for the most part, everything you do is always a repeat of what the first-born has done. The novelty has worn off.

It's no one's fault this is happening, but it still sucks. And since I'm not on Facebook, I really don't have much in terms of comfort from friends. I don't have any friends in Dubai who can comfort me.

It all sucks so much.

xo Jenea
- Everything is always okay in the end, and if it's not okay, then it's not the end.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Puberty Updates

I'm loving this time of my pregnancy. It's when everyone can actually see I'm pregnant and not just fat. HA! Also the baby is moving around like crazy. I love that he or she is active all day and seems to have a strong case of the hiccups. I took the glucose resistance test a few days ago and ever since it seems like my little one has had the hiccups. Weird! I'm starting to notice bodily changes more now. For example, my boobs are starting to show strong veins. Not colored ones, just one here or there that looks like I lift weights. I wonder if those are the ducts or whatever that will deliver the milk? I'm also seeing super strong veins on my wrists. My hands have started to feel like I have some sort of arthritis. I crack my knuckles every 10 minutes or so and I have done for many many years. But now it hurts when I do it. Or I should say it feels sore, it doesn't hurt at all. My fingers just feel really really stiff. It's hard to fall asle...
Read more

Post-Preggo Body Nightmares

Just before sitting down to write this, my hubby and I were discussing my future body. Really we were talking about my current body. "Your boobs are enormous." "Yeah, I was thinking that today. I'm really worried what they're gonna look like after children." "Well, you're not gonna have your boobs out anyway, right? So just buy nice bras." Ugh. I hate this idea that once you have children you're going to turn into some repulsive troll who wears trash bags for clothes. No thanks. I told my husband this and his response was my boobs aren't going to matter in the grand scheme of things. Life will be so fulfilling that things like how your boobs look will seem trivial. Pfff. I disagree. I very much enjoy looking good. I don't see a future where I don't try my best to pull myself together. Sure, I won't be wearing skimpy outfits, because I never have, but I'll still want to look extra sexy now and then...
Read more

35 Weeks Pregnant (and two days)

So it has happened again! I've gone a full week without updating this blog. I'm not sure what is happening with me other than I'm trying to deny the fact that birth is just around the corner. I'm in a sour mood today but more on that later. So I've made it to 35 weeks. I still feel wonderful. No issues with my health or body. I have the same pressure on my pubic bone that I've had for the last ten weeks, so nothing to report there. The baby is moving all day and night which means it's healthy and happy. Moving while I write this as a matter of fact. And now, the movements are so strong they jolt my whole body. It's amazing that in only 2 weeks I could become a mom. Sometimes that thought depresses, or maybe a better word is saddens, me. I'm not exactly sure why it makes me sad, but it does. Perhaps all the anxieties of being a mom and being a good mom make me doubt my abilities. Further, I don't have good friends here. For some reason t...
Read more